I can almost remember the days when the idea of staying up until 2am (or 3am, or 4am.....) was a challenge met with great happiness and vigor. That currently feels like a pretty long time ago and while I rarely just stay up until 2am, every night that the alarm goes off I feel a momentary dread before dragging myself out of my warm bed to enter the bears cave (aka: Sierras room).
I get it! Who in their right mind would like to be woken up out of a nice cozy sleep to be jabbed in the finger by a grumpy parent anyway? Really, I appreciate her stand point and the frequently resulting tantrums that (whether minor or massive - you flip the coin!) keep us up even longer than necessary on a handful of nights.
But yanno, seriously. I keep hearing about kids who sleep through their pokes, their correction shots or even infusion sets! WHAT? This sounds like some kind of magic world that doesn't really exist. It's the current Santa Clause of Diabetes for me. Sierra pops her eyes open the second her door moves along the carpet half of the time, never mind sleeping peacefully while I grab a finger for pricking. Usually it results in a mini-whine about which finger and her not wanting to open her eyes to look for the button to actually engage the needle for said poke (which she can't find without opening her eyes, obviously). But beware, if YOU push the button on the lancet device FOR her - the beast awakens and that's no joke. This is a 'flip out' clause. Do not pass go, or if you do - go at your own risk :|
I'm at the mercy of this grumpy little bean at 2am when my nerves are already fried and fuzzy around the edges. I hope one day she will sleep through it. I guess I thought if that was going to happen maybe by now would be it - but no luck to date.
This is just one of those "hrmph, this sucks" things about diabetes. Frank says I should look on the positive side - and he's mostly right - but I think there's room for honesty without a blah, lingering morosity. Unfortunately, the 2am alarm that startles me awake most nights is the rough patch for me.
You'd think Sierra's slept 10-12 hours the way she bounces into the room at 7am the following morning, where can I siphon some of that energy?? Coffee doesn't hold a candle to her internal workings.
<envy>
In October of 2011, our 3 year old daughter Sierra was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes and spent three nights at the local PICU. These are our stories, experiences, and our life as a family of four moving forward.
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Saturday, January 28, 2012
Preparing for the pump.
We've developed a pretty decent routine with 'MDI' (multiple-daily-injections) care for Sierra. She's finally not struggling for every shot, sometimes she complains that it stings (and to be fair - Lantus, the 24 hour basal insulin DOES sting :( ) and wiggles around a bit, but generally she's pretty cooperative for an almost 4 year old.
So why change it up?
Pumping technology is pretty cool. Aside from just being 'pretty cool', it's pretty great at helping (most) those who try it in achieving better overall diabetes management. The more I read up on pumping, the more I'm convinced this is absolutely, no question, the way we need to go.
Here's the stitch - I'mworried scared shitless. Are we ready for another big upward battle? Another massive, intense (albeit worthwhile) learning curve in caring for our little girl properly? I want to say yes, and I will say yes, but I am a little scared. I feel like it's taken us nearly 4 months to really get a halfway decent grip on this whole diabetes bit, and every single day is a new days with new lessons. So maybe it wouldn't be such a big deal to switch it up, but I know better. I know it's going to take at least a month or so after classes and training and trials to really start to figure out what it is we're doing with this pump stuff. I've read all I can online about the 3 major players:
Omnipod , Animas Ping, and Medtronic.
The technology for all of these is very similar, the way they work is *pretty* similar with a few standing points (like the omnipod, for example is 'tubeless', while the other two are not etc).
Thus far we seem to be leaning towards the Omnipod, both for the tubeless part and the 'not having to disconnect insulin while in the water for 60 minutes' part. We live by the ocean, we spend a lot of time at the pool - she will probably swim, so I think this might be important. Then again, in all honesty, what the hell do I know?! Only what I've read. Frank is going to be attending the next pump class at Standford to get the real schpeal on these things, and I hope he comes back with a stronger feeling than I have now on which we might want to go with. If still undecided, the reps will have to battle it out in person at our house :)
Pumping will help a great deal with a toddler/young child who likes to graze, and Sierra was the queen of grazers pre-diabetes. I think we should buy stock in olives and cheese sticks at this point, because we go through them like crazy. They're considered a "free" food - very low carb content so technically she can go gangbusters without insulin if she's hungry between meals on these and a few other things, but I can't say 3 cheese sticks later I'm feeling so great about the idea. The pump would help with that. It would also help if she finishes the dinner we set up for her and she decides that she wants seconds - imagine, no shot for that! Great!
This can all trickle down into talks of CGMs (continuous glucose monitors - sound cool, are probably pretty cool, but sadly do not eliminate the need for multiple finger pokes a day and thus low on our list of priorities at the current moment, we might get there at some point but the pump is up first for sure). Anyway, I won't divulge into that whole case just yet. Baby steps, right?
There's also another really cool option out there for us to help with Sierras care. A Skilled Companion Alert Dog. We are absolutely going to shoot for this as soon as Sisi is 1 year past diagnosis (a requirement to get on the list). My lab mix of 13 years passed away about a month ago, and Sierra was madly in love with her. She took her death very well, and is now in an almost daily pattern of asking when we'll be getting a new dog - I said maybe when she's 5. That should be about right assuming they choose us based on our application during that whole process. But I know Frank and I would both LOVE to have not only another dog, but one that can potentially (and will!) detect highs and lows in Sierra. Really? Bonus. True bonus. Companionship and also a little bit of a partner in diabetic care. Pretty cool. We understand a great deal about what it takes to own a dog like this as Franks mother has raised Guide Dogs for the blind for 30+ years. We definitely are up to the challenge.
Anyway, just some Saturday musings. I managed to get some sleep last night so I'm feeling pretty chipper. Pumps are weighing pretty heavily on my mind - to those of you in diabetic community who want to chime in here on how you feel about pumps in general (or sell me on yours!) I'd absolutely love it. We're in the beginning process here and have a lot of learning to do... was it as crazy as that first 2 weeks after diagnosis trying to switch from MDI to pump technology? Reassure me it's worth it, if nothing else, I'm definitely a little nervous and normally I'm pretty gung-ho let's get it done, so this is throwing me for a bit of a loop.
And also - we're heading to Maui at the end of April. If we were to hop onto a pump in, say, early March - would that leave enough learning time to feel confident in flying somewhere with it and knowing what to do? We wouldn't be out of touch with our endocrines, but are we crazy if we plan it this way?
So why change it up?
Pumping technology is pretty cool. Aside from just being 'pretty cool', it's pretty great at helping (most) those who try it in achieving better overall diabetes management. The more I read up on pumping, the more I'm convinced this is absolutely, no question, the way we need to go.
Here's the stitch - I'm
Omnipod , Animas Ping, and Medtronic.
The technology for all of these is very similar, the way they work is *pretty* similar with a few standing points (like the omnipod, for example is 'tubeless', while the other two are not etc).
Thus far we seem to be leaning towards the Omnipod, both for the tubeless part and the 'not having to disconnect insulin while in the water for 60 minutes' part. We live by the ocean, we spend a lot of time at the pool - she will probably swim, so I think this might be important. Then again, in all honesty, what the hell do I know?! Only what I've read. Frank is going to be attending the next pump class at Standford to get the real schpeal on these things, and I hope he comes back with a stronger feeling than I have now on which we might want to go with. If still undecided, the reps will have to battle it out in person at our house :)
Pumping will help a great deal with a toddler/young child who likes to graze, and Sierra was the queen of grazers pre-diabetes. I think we should buy stock in olives and cheese sticks at this point, because we go through them like crazy. They're considered a "free" food - very low carb content so technically she can go gangbusters without insulin if she's hungry between meals on these and a few other things, but I can't say 3 cheese sticks later I'm feeling so great about the idea. The pump would help with that. It would also help if she finishes the dinner we set up for her and she decides that she wants seconds - imagine, no shot for that! Great!
This can all trickle down into talks of CGMs (continuous glucose monitors - sound cool, are probably pretty cool, but sadly do not eliminate the need for multiple finger pokes a day and thus low on our list of priorities at the current moment, we might get there at some point but the pump is up first for sure). Anyway, I won't divulge into that whole case just yet. Baby steps, right?
There's also another really cool option out there for us to help with Sierras care. A Skilled Companion Alert Dog. We are absolutely going to shoot for this as soon as Sisi is 1 year past diagnosis (a requirement to get on the list). My lab mix of 13 years passed away about a month ago, and Sierra was madly in love with her. She took her death very well, and is now in an almost daily pattern of asking when we'll be getting a new dog - I said maybe when she's 5. That should be about right assuming they choose us based on our application during that whole process. But I know Frank and I would both LOVE to have not only another dog, but one that can potentially (and will!) detect highs and lows in Sierra. Really? Bonus. True bonus. Companionship and also a little bit of a partner in diabetic care. Pretty cool. We understand a great deal about what it takes to own a dog like this as Franks mother has raised Guide Dogs for the blind for 30+ years. We definitely are up to the challenge.
Anyway, just some Saturday musings. I managed to get some sleep last night so I'm feeling pretty chipper. Pumps are weighing pretty heavily on my mind - to those of you in diabetic community who want to chime in here on how you feel about pumps in general (or sell me on yours!) I'd absolutely love it. We're in the beginning process here and have a lot of learning to do... was it as crazy as that first 2 weeks after diagnosis trying to switch from MDI to pump technology? Reassure me it's worth it, if nothing else, I'm definitely a little nervous and normally I'm pretty gung-ho let's get it done, so this is throwing me for a bit of a loop.
And also - we're heading to Maui at the end of April. If we were to hop onto a pump in, say, early March - would that leave enough learning time to feel confident in flying somewhere with it and knowing what to do? We wouldn't be out of touch with our endocrines, but are we crazy if we plan it this way?
Thursday, January 26, 2012
The Diabetes Fog.
Truth be told I think there is a large portion of my 'dealings' with this disease through Sierra that I glaze over and go about in a fog. I'm happy that, for now, I can take the burden of remembering every poke and shot, every meal and carb count, every gathering of supplies for an outing.
This morning I received a link to this: http://tripeej.com/2012/01/24/whats-it-like-to-have-diabetes/ through one of my support groups. This is a hard read, this is the truth of long-lived diabetics today. She is an accomplished woman, and this doesn't take away from that, but it's a very honest and bold post about the not so known sides of living with diabetes. *Parents of little ones with t1d I do caution you here - it will probably make you cry and it's hard to read not knowing what the future may hold for our little ones. So please only go there if you have a hard shell and finish the rest of my post first.
At first I was geared up here to write a depressed, sad piece about how I feel about all of this. Then my husband came upstairs and asked me why on earth I'm reading things like that right now and tried to get my head back into the right game.
So I'm mid-head-wrap right now. I'm still sad about this reality, but the truth is if I really think about it, the odds of Sierra's treatment and 'control' needs being the same as they are today in 20 years? Pretty slim. In fact the doctors always tell us they really feel by the time she's a teen she's going to look back on these years and find it all pretty unbelievable (they gave me HOW many shots a day? What!). I'm going to try to re-group and focus on that.
I will say, however, that my insomnia and caring for a diabetic child are just not playing kindly together. I'm not sure what the solution to that is. Even if I were to get one good night of sleep a week, I'm not sure that'd be enough to keep my sanity long enough to do a bang-up job watching my two little tornados. This may just be another adaption form, but currently I look (as my dear husband put it - and I can't really give him a hard time because it's true!) like a 'train wreck'. Maybe more coffee will put the fog back in place for me today, and the bags under my eyes can be hidden by some makeup for now. I think the best I can do is hope for a better future, sooner rather than later, for myself AND for Sierra (and probably my husband and Max, too, let's face it - who is fun to be around when they're chronically tired? Trust me I know).
This morning I received a link to this: http://tripeej.com/2012/01/24/whats-it-like-to-have-diabetes/ through one of my support groups. This is a hard read, this is the truth of long-lived diabetics today. She is an accomplished woman, and this doesn't take away from that, but it's a very honest and bold post about the not so known sides of living with diabetes. *Parents of little ones with t1d I do caution you here - it will probably make you cry and it's hard to read not knowing what the future may hold for our little ones. So please only go there if you have a hard shell and finish the rest of my post first.
At first I was geared up here to write a depressed, sad piece about how I feel about all of this. Then my husband came upstairs and asked me why on earth I'm reading things like that right now and tried to get my head back into the right game.
So I'm mid-head-wrap right now. I'm still sad about this reality, but the truth is if I really think about it, the odds of Sierra's treatment and 'control' needs being the same as they are today in 20 years? Pretty slim. In fact the doctors always tell us they really feel by the time she's a teen she's going to look back on these years and find it all pretty unbelievable (they gave me HOW many shots a day? What!). I'm going to try to re-group and focus on that.
I will say, however, that my insomnia and caring for a diabetic child are just not playing kindly together. I'm not sure what the solution to that is. Even if I were to get one good night of sleep a week, I'm not sure that'd be enough to keep my sanity long enough to do a bang-up job watching my two little tornados. This may just be another adaption form, but currently I look (as my dear husband put it - and I can't really give him a hard time because it's true!) like a 'train wreck'. Maybe more coffee will put the fog back in place for me today, and the bags under my eyes can be hidden by some makeup for now. I think the best I can do is hope for a better future, sooner rather than later, for myself AND for Sierra (and probably my husband and Max, too, let's face it - who is fun to be around when they're chronically tired? Trust me I know).
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Stubborn Lows
While the family and I are still new to this whole diabetes thing, we've already had plenty of face time with something we call 'stubborn lows'. This is a low blood sugar drop (say, 35-45 range) that for some reason - no matter how much sugar or how many carbs we throw at it, doesn't seem to want to leave.
Last night after what I thought was a pretty standard measurement for home made chili (ie: mostly beans, and some meat) - I gave Sierra her dose of insulin and left her home with Frank so I could go teach my kickboxing class. No problem. After class I peaked at my phone before cleaning up and had a text that said she was 39. Whaaaat? Ok - so this is probably my fault. I probably over-estimated the amount of beans in her near-cup serving, and maybe over guessed her insulin amount. Granted, I went on the cautious side and even included a few strawberries 'just in case', but apparently that plus a minor correction (additional insulin we add to her meal shots if she's over 150, basically) was too much for her yesterday.
By the time I was home 20 minutes after said text message, she'd had 4oz of juice (normally this alone would boost her to at least 80-110) and a 14g (carbs!) sugar free chocolate pudding snack pack. The test results? 53. Really? REALLY? It's 8pm here, by the way, and no only is my child jacked up on sugar from juice she rarely gets, she's also low, and that is a big process in and of itself.
Based on a few past scenarios, we didn't want to shove TOO much at the problem - when we've done that and for some reason it's taking longer for her body to absorb the carbs we're throwing at her, when we do our 2am finger poke she's always skyrocketed above 200. So we were cautious, but nervous. We gave her 9 teddy grahams (is it funny we literally count every cookie now?) and a few ounces of milk just in case.
Bed time verdict (45 minutes later!)? 91. We do NOT like putting her to bed under 100, but we also don't like waking her up to a 200+, either. What to do, what to do? These are the games diabetes can play, and they're so frustrating, confusing and leave you feeling somewhat helpless to 'fix' the situation.
We went ahead on our gut that between the 50-some-odd carbs she'd gotten to try and bring her up she was bound to be high by 2am, and put her to bed (finally) at 9 - but she was still pretty wound up. She was out by 10. Whew.
Max was kind enough to decide last night was a good time to wake up at 11 and need some rocking to fall back asleep (cold?), so that was cool. I didn't need sleep anyway. Why would I need sleep.
At 2am the alarm goes off, I drag my sorry butt into her room where our usual game of her whining about not wanting to do a poke and my grumbling response of 'I know, ok let's do it hurry up I'm tired and cold and you need to go back to sleep' takes place. If you hadn't noticed, while I feel really bummed for my kid - I also have a pretty hard stance about the fact that it is what it is, and we just need to do what we need to do and that's that. Makes it sound simple, and that's not to say I don't have plenty of "why us, this sucks, I hate this for her, I hate this for me, I hate this for our family" moments - generally it just is what it is. I have to do this, she has to do this, so the less whining and the more adapting the better if you ask me. It's not like we have an option, so let's suck it up and do what needs to be done.
(Geez, I'm kind of a hardass huh? She IS only almost 4... still, I know how quickly kids can adapt, and I know this is no fun - but I know she can do it. So I try to remain somewhat stoic during the night episodes, the last thing I need is an hour of coddling and letting her know I think it's a big pile of poo that she got dealt this crappy hand in life at 2am, we can commiserate about it sucking another time - like daylight.)
Anyway, sorry, long story short - she was 76. MF'er. Really? REALLY? After that many carbs? Come on! Stubborn, f'ing, lows! So then I get to wake my whiny toddler up further, by shoving a juice box in her face and having her chug it down. Normally, technically, we 'should' wait 15 minutes and test her again, but I knew cooperation wasn't going to flow, and I knew that the juice would hold her until morning. At least I was pretty sure it was.
Thankfully, this time I was right. She woke up at 180. Guess the juice worked better at 2am than it did at 7pm. No idea why, but that's diabetes.
Last night after what I thought was a pretty standard measurement for home made chili (ie: mostly beans, and some meat) - I gave Sierra her dose of insulin and left her home with Frank so I could go teach my kickboxing class. No problem. After class I peaked at my phone before cleaning up and had a text that said she was 39. Whaaaat? Ok - so this is probably my fault. I probably over-estimated the amount of beans in her near-cup serving, and maybe over guessed her insulin amount. Granted, I went on the cautious side and even included a few strawberries 'just in case', but apparently that plus a minor correction (additional insulin we add to her meal shots if she's over 150, basically) was too much for her yesterday.
By the time I was home 20 minutes after said text message, she'd had 4oz of juice (normally this alone would boost her to at least 80-110) and a 14g (carbs!) sugar free chocolate pudding snack pack. The test results? 53. Really? REALLY? It's 8pm here, by the way, and no only is my child jacked up on sugar from juice she rarely gets, she's also low, and that is a big process in and of itself.
Based on a few past scenarios, we didn't want to shove TOO much at the problem - when we've done that and for some reason it's taking longer for her body to absorb the carbs we're throwing at her, when we do our 2am finger poke she's always skyrocketed above 200. So we were cautious, but nervous. We gave her 9 teddy grahams (is it funny we literally count every cookie now?) and a few ounces of milk just in case.
Bed time verdict (45 minutes later!)? 91. We do NOT like putting her to bed under 100, but we also don't like waking her up to a 200+, either. What to do, what to do? These are the games diabetes can play, and they're so frustrating, confusing and leave you feeling somewhat helpless to 'fix' the situation.
We went ahead on our gut that between the 50-some-odd carbs she'd gotten to try and bring her up she was bound to be high by 2am, and put her to bed (finally) at 9 - but she was still pretty wound up. She was out by 10. Whew.
Max was kind enough to decide last night was a good time to wake up at 11 and need some rocking to fall back asleep (cold?), so that was cool. I didn't need sleep anyway. Why would I need sleep.
At 2am the alarm goes off, I drag my sorry butt into her room where our usual game of her whining about not wanting to do a poke and my grumbling response of 'I know, ok let's do it hurry up I'm tired and cold and you need to go back to sleep' takes place. If you hadn't noticed, while I feel really bummed for my kid - I also have a pretty hard stance about the fact that it is what it is, and we just need to do what we need to do and that's that. Makes it sound simple, and that's not to say I don't have plenty of "why us, this sucks, I hate this for her, I hate this for me, I hate this for our family" moments - generally it just is what it is. I have to do this, she has to do this, so the less whining and the more adapting the better if you ask me. It's not like we have an option, so let's suck it up and do what needs to be done.
(Geez, I'm kind of a hardass huh? She IS only almost 4... still, I know how quickly kids can adapt, and I know this is no fun - but I know she can do it. So I try to remain somewhat stoic during the night episodes, the last thing I need is an hour of coddling and letting her know I think it's a big pile of poo that she got dealt this crappy hand in life at 2am, we can commiserate about it sucking another time - like daylight.)
Anyway, sorry, long story short - she was 76. MF'er. Really? REALLY? After that many carbs? Come on! Stubborn, f'ing, lows! So then I get to wake my whiny toddler up further, by shoving a juice box in her face and having her chug it down. Normally, technically, we 'should' wait 15 minutes and test her again, but I knew cooperation wasn't going to flow, and I knew that the juice would hold her until morning. At least I was pretty sure it was.
Thankfully, this time I was right. She woke up at 180. Guess the juice worked better at 2am than it did at 7pm. No idea why, but that's diabetes.
Monday, January 23, 2012
The Daily Grind.
When a child of yours is diagnosed with diabetes, suddenly you eat, sleep and breathe it. You wake up, you poke, calculate and give shots then do it over and over again. Interestingly enough, as this process is extremely tedious and often met with various forms of whining or fabulously formulated toddler-delay tactics, I guess it's not so bad. It's sort of like after you have a 2nd kid - I could've SWORN having a newborn the first time (and an infant, and then a toddler) was way harder than it was. I had a second, and everything took longer with two but the actual being himself (Mr. Max) wasn't nearly as difficult day to day as I remember Sierra ever being. Even though he cried for 7 months, but that's neither here nor there.
What I'm trying to say is the daily grind is intensive, sometimes frustrating, and often just... part of our day now. I remember when we came home from the hospital and started the new processes and I seriously thought we'd never get into a good flow. That meals would always be delayed a good 20-30 minutes trying to deal with wrangling my 3 year old for finger pokes then begging her to sit still for shots. Now it's all very robotic and even somewhat 'smooth' more days than not, even if it's still a little time consuming, I just don't notice any more.
I'll admit I'm not really sure where I'm going with this, I just know that before our D diagnosis I genuinely didn't have the slightest clue about what it took to take care of and manage diabetes (naturally) and now that I'm in it, I wonder if I can really express to family, friends and curious onlookers exactly what it takes.
I hear how proud and impressed and in awe people are of how I'm dealing with Sierra's stuff, and I feel baffled. No, really, I mean it. It's very nice to hear that these people think I have my crap together and I'm doing well - and maybe I am - but you get so lost in the doing that it's hard to really take a step back and say "oh hey, yeah, I've got this!". I'm not sure with an illness like this that there is a lot of time or consideration for patting yourselves on the back, because the second you do the ugly side peaks out and kicks your butt off that little pony faster than you can blink.
I've started to think of diabetes as a particularly stereotypical jerkoff teenager. You know that there is *opportunity* for greatness. You SEE shades of greatness (in the form of a nice few days of really well controlled blood sugar and surprisingly great behavior), then just when you start thinking you've worked through your troubles WHAM! You're punched in the face for no good reason at all. At least none that you can really figure out. You literally change nothing on the outside, but apparently something chemical is going on inside that throws everyone and everything for a loop. Jerkoff!
On one of my diabetic support boards, someone posted "With diabetes there is no right. Just sometimes you're a little less wrong" (I'm paraphrasing, but this basically what was said). And that is so true.
There is no right in diabetes. And if you think you've figured it out, odds are it'll teach you a nice little lesson about assumptions. It's a real and truthful way of viewing it. We will always do our best, but I have to remind myself that in this life I've been given it's no longer up to me when we're going to have 'good' or 'bad' diabetes days. And there are plenty of both on the horizon, I'm sure. Right now we're in a little lump of relatively good days, last week we had about 3 bad days. I suspect this will just be the way it is for a good while, and accepting that will be a big step for me.
I've decided Max has the best 'game face' for serious matters, so I think I'll set him on the insurance calls from here on out, and I'll leave you with this:
What I'm trying to say is the daily grind is intensive, sometimes frustrating, and often just... part of our day now. I remember when we came home from the hospital and started the new processes and I seriously thought we'd never get into a good flow. That meals would always be delayed a good 20-30 minutes trying to deal with wrangling my 3 year old for finger pokes then begging her to sit still for shots. Now it's all very robotic and even somewhat 'smooth' more days than not, even if it's still a little time consuming, I just don't notice any more.
I'll admit I'm not really sure where I'm going with this, I just know that before our D diagnosis I genuinely didn't have the slightest clue about what it took to take care of and manage diabetes (naturally) and now that I'm in it, I wonder if I can really express to family, friends and curious onlookers exactly what it takes.
I hear how proud and impressed and in awe people are of how I'm dealing with Sierra's stuff, and I feel baffled. No, really, I mean it. It's very nice to hear that these people think I have my crap together and I'm doing well - and maybe I am - but you get so lost in the doing that it's hard to really take a step back and say "oh hey, yeah, I've got this!". I'm not sure with an illness like this that there is a lot of time or consideration for patting yourselves on the back, because the second you do the ugly side peaks out and kicks your butt off that little pony faster than you can blink.
I've started to think of diabetes as a particularly stereotypical jerkoff teenager. You know that there is *opportunity* for greatness. You SEE shades of greatness (in the form of a nice few days of really well controlled blood sugar and surprisingly great behavior), then just when you start thinking you've worked through your troubles WHAM! You're punched in the face for no good reason at all. At least none that you can really figure out. You literally change nothing on the outside, but apparently something chemical is going on inside that throws everyone and everything for a loop. Jerkoff!
On one of my diabetic support boards, someone posted "With diabetes there is no right. Just sometimes you're a little less wrong" (I'm paraphrasing, but this basically what was said). And that is so true.
There is no right in diabetes. And if you think you've figured it out, odds are it'll teach you a nice little lesson about assumptions. It's a real and truthful way of viewing it. We will always do our best, but I have to remind myself that in this life I've been given it's no longer up to me when we're going to have 'good' or 'bad' diabetes days. And there are plenty of both on the horizon, I'm sure. Right now we're in a little lump of relatively good days, last week we had about 3 bad days. I suspect this will just be the way it is for a good while, and accepting that will be a big step for me.
I've decided Max has the best 'game face' for serious matters, so I think I'll set him on the insurance calls from here on out, and I'll leave you with this:
Saturday, January 21, 2012
Searching for Sanity...
First - I want to say hello, welcome and THANK YOU to all of the new comment-ers that found me through other diabetic mom blogs, it's so good to hear from you and find more blogs focusing around this life change! I will definitely be checking out your blogs as well, and look forward to getting to know more about how everyone else is dealing with this life handed to us.
This post isn't going to be a diabetes-focused post. But a parent focused one.
Now, as parents (and moms) I feel that often that's our introduction or our 'title'. "Hi, I'm Melissa - Sierra's mom.". That's great. I love being a mom, I love my kids, I love being home with them even then they are driving me absolutely BATTY - there's no shame in this game. However, I'll be first in line to say when I don't take time to take care of the 'me' that is not JUST mom, the whole household feels the effects. And thus the title: Searching for Sanity.
I find that being busy with things beyond just what is required of me helps me cope. Not just with being the parent of a diabetic child (which I'm learning is very time consuming, and all encompassing at times), but also 'just' being a parent in itself of two very young, very active children. I don't want to come across as a selfish, self focused person but I'm not here to mince words or be something that I'm not in my little blog-land, either.
Being a mom is not enough for me. I need other things to enrich my life beyond the wonderful world of parenting. That isn't to say being a mom and wife aren't my most IMPORTANT priorities, they are, and they do require the top slots on the proverbial 'list'. However, without things that I can stand behind that are wholly for just my own being, I'm a mess. A grumpy, unhappy, miserable mess. Not ideal, but it is what it is, and I admit to myself and others freely. If I am in just mom mode for too long and fall behind on doing things that I want to or really NEED to do to make myself feel whole it's not pretty. So, in an effort to encourage others who may feel the same (diabetic-mommies or not! this applies to everyone if you ask me) I wanted to share how I attempt to find a balance in my life while struggling to keep up at the same time. I do it to myself, my mom tells me I'm crazy for always running around like a chicken with my head cut off all of the time. If I slow down too much, I might find I lose an opportunity to enrich myself and thus my family, so forward march it is!
Melissa's Sanity Savers:
Step 1: Put your must list aside for 10 minutes and think about what you can and would do given the time or drive. Got that? This can be anything that helps you feel more like yourself and not just one part of yourself. Read a book. Take a bath, learn guitar or write a novel. It doesn't matter, dream big or small just DREAM for something, what is life about anyway? :) Maybe being a mom and thinking of time for special crafts or outtings for or with the kid IS your thing - GREAT! Dream about that and take time to focus on it. I'm not going to assume for a second there aren't plenty of amazing people out there who feel like being the parent is really what they feel completely enriched by - I'm just speaking for myself here because I know me.
Step 2: Ok so you've figured out what you can and would do for yourself to help fill maybe a sliver of the whole-person-pie? Great! Now you just need to prioritize when and how these things will happen. This might be the hard part, but do it anyway, it'll be worth it in the long run
My can and do priorities are in full swing now that I've put some time and elbow grease into them. I'm a photographer and run a business on the side (Silvertide Photography, for those are curious, but this blog isn't about that), and I also instruct cardio kickboxing classes twice a week at a local self defense and fitness gym.
I NEED creative outlet - I used to paint, be on stage, write poetry. When I found I didn't have the same drive for those things, I shifted my vision to photography and it's consumed me in a glorious way. It is my expression and my freedom. Sometimes it's hard to keep up, but I create my own schedule and I know how good it is for my heart to be in it. I feel deprived without it, and deprived mommy doesn't make our house a happy place over time.
I also need exercise. What better aggression and stress busting possibility does anything hold next to kickboxing for an hour to loud music with heavy gloves? Add in childcare and the chance to force poor innocent class attendees into dripping massive amounts of sweat on the floor and call me happy! This was a no brainer.
Step 3: Breathe. You may not have time to fulfill yourself, your to-do lists and everyone in your families needs all of the time. I know my husband may not agree with my theory here but sometimes, the house can wait. Sometimes my cup needs more filling than the floors need vacuuming. To be fair, I still struggle with finding this balance, and I'm not the best house-keeper in the world, but I am making an effort and trying to find the best way to get myself through this lifes up and downs while being true to myself, my kids, and my family as a whole. I do need time to take care of myself, even if 75% of me goes to everyone else first.
Reserve that 25% for yourself, you're living this life too. You deserve it, and it might even make the rest of your world flow easier too.
See, 3 easy steps! If only everything in life could be so easy :)
I know this sounds simple, but I also know plenty of friends, acquaintances and online persona's who are struggling on this point. A friend of mine once told me that she really respected my ability to not just know that I need 'something', but that I can actually articulate and relate to what 'it' is - and then do my best to make it happen.
The times I struggle is when I am forced out of my happy 'doing what I need to do for every ones sake' box. This happened when Sierra was diagnosed, I was completely thrown from everything for about 2 months and I was sour and depressed, but I knew it had to happen. I'm working everything back in now, and I feel like I can handle most days better than I could without. And all in all, the balance is a constant adjustment I'm willing to make.
I think all any of us can hope for is to do our best for everyone (but that everyone includes ourselves).
This post isn't going to be a diabetes-focused post. But a parent focused one.
Now, as parents (and moms) I feel that often that's our introduction or our 'title'. "Hi, I'm Melissa - Sierra's mom.". That's great. I love being a mom, I love my kids, I love being home with them even then they are driving me absolutely BATTY - there's no shame in this game. However, I'll be first in line to say when I don't take time to take care of the 'me' that is not JUST mom, the whole household feels the effects. And thus the title: Searching for Sanity.
I find that being busy with things beyond just what is required of me helps me cope. Not just with being the parent of a diabetic child (which I'm learning is very time consuming, and all encompassing at times), but also 'just' being a parent in itself of two very young, very active children. I don't want to come across as a selfish, self focused person but I'm not here to mince words or be something that I'm not in my little blog-land, either.
Being a mom is not enough for me. I need other things to enrich my life beyond the wonderful world of parenting. That isn't to say being a mom and wife aren't my most IMPORTANT priorities, they are, and they do require the top slots on the proverbial 'list'. However, without things that I can stand behind that are wholly for just my own being, I'm a mess. A grumpy, unhappy, miserable mess. Not ideal, but it is what it is, and I admit to myself and others freely. If I am in just mom mode for too long and fall behind on doing things that I want to or really NEED to do to make myself feel whole it's not pretty. So, in an effort to encourage others who may feel the same (diabetic-mommies or not! this applies to everyone if you ask me) I wanted to share how I attempt to find a balance in my life while struggling to keep up at the same time. I do it to myself, my mom tells me I'm crazy for always running around like a chicken with my head cut off all of the time. If I slow down too much, I might find I lose an opportunity to enrich myself and thus my family, so forward march it is!
Melissa's Sanity Savers:
Step 1: Put your must list aside for 10 minutes and think about what you can and would do given the time or drive. Got that? This can be anything that helps you feel more like yourself and not just one part of yourself. Read a book. Take a bath, learn guitar or write a novel. It doesn't matter, dream big or small just DREAM for something, what is life about anyway? :) Maybe being a mom and thinking of time for special crafts or outtings for or with the kid IS your thing - GREAT! Dream about that and take time to focus on it. I'm not going to assume for a second there aren't plenty of amazing people out there who feel like being the parent is really what they feel completely enriched by - I'm just speaking for myself here because I know me.
Step 2: Ok so you've figured out what you can and would do for yourself to help fill maybe a sliver of the whole-person-pie? Great! Now you just need to prioritize when and how these things will happen. This might be the hard part, but do it anyway, it'll be worth it in the long run
My can and do priorities are in full swing now that I've put some time and elbow grease into them. I'm a photographer and run a business on the side (Silvertide Photography, for those are curious, but this blog isn't about that), and I also instruct cardio kickboxing classes twice a week at a local self defense and fitness gym.
I NEED creative outlet - I used to paint, be on stage, write poetry. When I found I didn't have the same drive for those things, I shifted my vision to photography and it's consumed me in a glorious way. It is my expression and my freedom. Sometimes it's hard to keep up, but I create my own schedule and I know how good it is for my heart to be in it. I feel deprived without it, and deprived mommy doesn't make our house a happy place over time.
I also need exercise. What better aggression and stress busting possibility does anything hold next to kickboxing for an hour to loud music with heavy gloves? Add in childcare and the chance to force poor innocent class attendees into dripping massive amounts of sweat on the floor and call me happy! This was a no brainer.
Step 3: Breathe. You may not have time to fulfill yourself, your to-do lists and everyone in your families needs all of the time. I know my husband may not agree with my theory here but sometimes, the house can wait. Sometimes my cup needs more filling than the floors need vacuuming. To be fair, I still struggle with finding this balance, and I'm not the best house-keeper in the world, but I am making an effort and trying to find the best way to get myself through this lifes up and downs while being true to myself, my kids, and my family as a whole. I do need time to take care of myself, even if 75% of me goes to everyone else first.
Reserve that 25% for yourself, you're living this life too. You deserve it, and it might even make the rest of your world flow easier too.
See, 3 easy steps! If only everything in life could be so easy :)
I know this sounds simple, but I also know plenty of friends, acquaintances and online persona's who are struggling on this point. A friend of mine once told me that she really respected my ability to not just know that I need 'something', but that I can actually articulate and relate to what 'it' is - and then do my best to make it happen.
The times I struggle is when I am forced out of my happy 'doing what I need to do for every ones sake' box. This happened when Sierra was diagnosed, I was completely thrown from everything for about 2 months and I was sour and depressed, but I knew it had to happen. I'm working everything back in now, and I feel like I can handle most days better than I could without. And all in all, the balance is a constant adjustment I'm willing to make.
I think all any of us can hope for is to do our best for everyone (but that everyone includes ourselves).
Friday, January 20, 2012
Wait, what?
I figured for reference sake (so that hopefully most of my posts make sense to even those not neck-deep in diabetic lifestyles...) I'd throw out a few of the more common words I'll be using to relate to things we're doing for Sierra:
Diabetes, in a VERY basic explanation - is the slow death of the pancreas. Your pancreas secrets insulin to turn the sugars and glucose you eat (carbs!!) into energy for your body. Diabetes is an auto-immune disease where healthy cells attack the pancreas and thus it can't produce the needed insulin - so your body is deprived of energy. No fun, no fun at all. When you reach onset (when you get sick and are diagnosed, basically) there's MAYBE 20% of your pancreas still functioning, it's trying to hang on, but your own body is beating it up. That's why we need insulin shots, if sugar isn't turned to energy in your blood - you can go into Diabetic ketoacidosis - or as we call it - DKA. (follow the link for more detailed info on that).
Anyway, here are a few more common terms for us that I'll be using casually from here on out:
Poke: This is how we refer to her finger-sticks. We use the OneTouch UltraII meter currently for no good reason other than that's the one the hospital gave us and it seems to be working just fine. You take out the finger stick (looks like a pen) - then you give your finger a poke, hold up the meter with a little strip in it to the drop of blood - and blast off, we have a blood sugar reading! We do this 5-10 times a day, if I had to guess.
Lows and Highs: Our Endocrine (diabetes specialist doctors) would prefer Sierra sit in a 100-150 blood sugar reading range. That's her 'ideal' for now. The typical person or adult is typically somewhere between 70-100. We like to go a little higher with young children to be on the safe side, lows are no bueno.
So for us - we consider anything below 85 or so a 'low'. How we treat them varies, I won't get into that because I'm not here to train everyone in taking care of my kid - but if she goes under 70 let's just say it's a little worrisome. We really don't like those - those are loooow.We caught her at 35 the other day, and wow she was out of it. She'd fallen asleep after a birthday party and dropped heavily, I decided to test because something just felt off. I had to flop her over and stick a straw in her mouth but once she got some juice in her system she was feeling much more normal. Scary!
Highs are tough, because you can't really feed a kid when they're high unless you give them an extra shot of insulin (sounds fun right? yeah). Highs for us are usually anything over 180 - but the more concerning highs that sorta freak us out come after about 250. We still have a very hard time discerning when Sierra is low or high outside of blood sugar checks (pokes) - she can't really tell us what's going on yet, but hopefully that will come later. Sometimes she seems extra warm, or REALLY thirsty, or really tired, or extremely cranky. Not like "I'm 3 and I'm throwing a massive tantrum BECAUSE I'm 3 so there" - but like "omgtheworldisending - I NEED xyz NOW because I WANT IT AHHHHH!!!!". It's about 1 point higher than your average 3 year old tantrum which is no less demanding or completely unreasonable. It can be hard to tell the difference but usually I can.
What else?
Ooh welcome to the world of carb counting. EVERYTHING! Who knew math would be something you ACTUALLY use at a higher level on a very regular basis? My teachers did, I guess, but I sure didn't think so :P Lucky for me, I've done the whole carb counting-diet thing in the past so this wasn't too big a transition other than extending the onset of meal times quite a bit. It's an interesting little process, and I'm getting better and eyeballing and memorizing certain things, but it's still tedious and important enough that you suck it up with a smile and double check your numbers.
Shots: Self explanatory right? We do at least 4 a day. Humalog is her *fast-acting* meal-time insulin (so every meal). Lantus is her 24 hours "basal/long-lasting" insulin. She gets that one just once a day.
In case you hadn't noticed, I'm wordy. I try not to be and then my posts don't make sense, so if you do want to follow the blog be prepared!
The next goal for us: the consideration of moving to PUMP technology. A pump is something you place on the diabetics body and leave for 3-4 days, full of insulin, that gives a constant small-drip that you control through a cool pager-cell phone looking thing. This is very basic terminology, it'd be a big learning curve for us, but I think it could be a really positive step in management and making things easier on all of us. I won't divulge too much on it now since we're still learning ourselves. Currently she's 'wearing' the Omnipod pump - this is a demo pump with no actual insulin/needle etc - it's just the pod body that you wear to see if you find it comfortable etc.
Looks big, doesn't it? But we like that it's water-proof up to 25 feet and 60 minutes, and that it is tubeless so we have a wireless remote to give her bolus' (extra doses of upped insulin for meals etc) whenever she needs it. Pretty awesome right?
Props to you if you read this whole thing, I know the jargon can be a bit much, but I hope it helps give a 'basic' mindset over the kinds of things we're dealing with day to day - and what it all means. I am clearly not a medical professional or a diabetes specialist, just a mom who is nearly 4 months in to a diagnosis I'm trying to wrap my head around at a pace faster than anything else I've had to learn before.
Diabetes, in a VERY basic explanation - is the slow death of the pancreas. Your pancreas secrets insulin to turn the sugars and glucose you eat (carbs!!) into energy for your body. Diabetes is an auto-immune disease where healthy cells attack the pancreas and thus it can't produce the needed insulin - so your body is deprived of energy. No fun, no fun at all. When you reach onset (when you get sick and are diagnosed, basically) there's MAYBE 20% of your pancreas still functioning, it's trying to hang on, but your own body is beating it up. That's why we need insulin shots, if sugar isn't turned to energy in your blood - you can go into Diabetic ketoacidosis - or as we call it - DKA. (follow the link for more detailed info on that).
Anyway, here are a few more common terms for us that I'll be using casually from here on out:
Poke: This is how we refer to her finger-sticks. We use the OneTouch UltraII meter currently for no good reason other than that's the one the hospital gave us and it seems to be working just fine. You take out the finger stick (looks like a pen) - then you give your finger a poke, hold up the meter with a little strip in it to the drop of blood - and blast off, we have a blood sugar reading! We do this 5-10 times a day, if I had to guess.
Lows and Highs: Our Endocrine (diabetes specialist doctors) would prefer Sierra sit in a 100-150 blood sugar reading range. That's her 'ideal' for now. The typical person or adult is typically somewhere between 70-100. We like to go a little higher with young children to be on the safe side, lows are no bueno.
So for us - we consider anything below 85 or so a 'low'. How we treat them varies, I won't get into that because I'm not here to train everyone in taking care of my kid - but if she goes under 70 let's just say it's a little worrisome. We really don't like those - those are loooow.We caught her at 35 the other day, and wow she was out of it. She'd fallen asleep after a birthday party and dropped heavily, I decided to test because something just felt off. I had to flop her over and stick a straw in her mouth but once she got some juice in her system she was feeling much more normal. Scary!
Highs are tough, because you can't really feed a kid when they're high unless you give them an extra shot of insulin (sounds fun right? yeah). Highs for us are usually anything over 180 - but the more concerning highs that sorta freak us out come after about 250. We still have a very hard time discerning when Sierra is low or high outside of blood sugar checks (pokes) - she can't really tell us what's going on yet, but hopefully that will come later. Sometimes she seems extra warm, or REALLY thirsty, or really tired, or extremely cranky. Not like "I'm 3 and I'm throwing a massive tantrum BECAUSE I'm 3 so there" - but like "omgtheworldisending - I NEED xyz NOW because I WANT IT AHHHHH!!!!". It's about 1 point higher than your average 3 year old tantrum which is no less demanding or completely unreasonable. It can be hard to tell the difference but usually I can.
What else?
Ooh welcome to the world of carb counting. EVERYTHING! Who knew math would be something you ACTUALLY use at a higher level on a very regular basis? My teachers did, I guess, but I sure didn't think so :P Lucky for me, I've done the whole carb counting-diet thing in the past so this wasn't too big a transition other than extending the onset of meal times quite a bit. It's an interesting little process, and I'm getting better and eyeballing and memorizing certain things, but it's still tedious and important enough that you suck it up with a smile and double check your numbers.
Shots: Self explanatory right? We do at least 4 a day. Humalog is her *fast-acting* meal-time insulin (so every meal). Lantus is her 24 hours "basal/long-lasting" insulin. She gets that one just once a day.
In case you hadn't noticed, I'm wordy. I try not to be and then my posts don't make sense, so if you do want to follow the blog be prepared!
The next goal for us: the consideration of moving to PUMP technology. A pump is something you place on the diabetics body and leave for 3-4 days, full of insulin, that gives a constant small-drip that you control through a cool pager-cell phone looking thing. This is very basic terminology, it'd be a big learning curve for us, but I think it could be a really positive step in management and making things easier on all of us. I won't divulge too much on it now since we're still learning ourselves. Currently she's 'wearing' the Omnipod pump - this is a demo pump with no actual insulin/needle etc - it's just the pod body that you wear to see if you find it comfortable etc.
Looks big, doesn't it? But we like that it's water-proof up to 25 feet and 60 minutes, and that it is tubeless so we have a wireless remote to give her bolus' (extra doses of upped insulin for meals etc) whenever she needs it. Pretty awesome right?
Props to you if you read this whole thing, I know the jargon can be a bit much, but I hope it helps give a 'basic' mindset over the kinds of things we're dealing with day to day - and what it all means. I am clearly not a medical professional or a diabetes specialist, just a mom who is nearly 4 months in to a diagnosis I'm trying to wrap my head around at a pace faster than anything else I've had to learn before.
Thursday, January 19, 2012
A New Chapter
I've thought a long time about considering the option of a blog detailing the somewhat crazy nature of our family life these days, and I found my biggest concerns were not whether it would be cathartic or therapeutic (not only for myself but for my husband and perhaps my kids one day, too), but how on earth I'd fit it in. The bags under my eyes clearly present what I SHOULD be doing with the free time I'm using to type this post, and yet I do feel the lingering effects of just letting it out there will probably be better suited to me in the long run (remind me of this at 2am tonight during our blood-check!).
Rewind 3 and a half months to mid-October of last year. The sun is shining, my family and I are in a beautiful rental home on Poipu, Kauai - enjoying the beach and (I am) secretly wondering if our daughters recent liquid obsession will end any time soon. You see, for the last week, our 3 year olds water consumption has hit levels I couldn't dream possible. 20...30...40 ounces and hour and still (really!?), still she's 'so so thirsty'! Why is she waking up to tell us she wants MORE to drink? Is this some kind of new toddler game we haven't heard about? Does she have a bladder infection? Do we tell her no? What are we going to do about these sheets??
A lot of our pictures look like this (sippies as far as the eye can see!):
Still, we enjoyed our vacation and made the flight home safely none the wiser. Three days later, upon some advice from a friend to just 'get her checked out', and even more thirst complaints (even at 3am) I decided I'd better do just that. I had some idea of the fact it could be diabetes, a dread, I suppose, going in to that appointment - but it seemed so... far-fetched. Dream like. She couldn't have diabetes! No one in either of our families has had it, that just wouldn't make sense.
The doctor knew, the nurse knew, and 20 minutes later so did I.
We spent 3 nights in PICU, where we ranged from emotions of disbelief, rage, angst, pity, sorrow and worry. Once we jumped through those emotional hoops, we began to get educated. She began to feel better thanks to hydration and insulin, and we began our 'new normal'. This blog is to document bits and pieces of our lives surrounding things as little as day to day, and as big as the future.
Thankfully there are a lot of good sources out there, and thank God for the internet - sincerely. The support out there and the 'family' of people just like us is an amazing comfort and a huge pit of knowledge for us to pull from.
Flash forward to today: we're still young into our diagnosis, but we have a routine and some knowledge that is coupled with anywhere from 5-10 'pokes' (finger stick blood sugar checks) and 4+ shots of insulin a day, and Sierra has her moments but she is full of energy, love and the wackiness I always expect will be there. We count carbs, we watch snacks, we keep our chins up at potlucks and birthday parties and we learn as we go.
I look forward to letting it out here. This was just the introduction :) I'm Melissa, mother to Sierra (our little diabetic - she'll be 4 in May), Max - nearly 2 and boy wonder of the house, and wife to Frank - who is forever graciously listening to my 'reading-way-too-much-online and word-vomiting it back at him the second he gets home' moments. We are a family, and we're going to take this thing by the horns as best we can. Here's to the highs and lows of diabetes (that's a lame diabetes pun, get it?), and this blog.
Welcome to our new normal.
Rewind 3 and a half months to mid-October of last year. The sun is shining, my family and I are in a beautiful rental home on Poipu, Kauai - enjoying the beach and (I am) secretly wondering if our daughters recent liquid obsession will end any time soon. You see, for the last week, our 3 year olds water consumption has hit levels I couldn't dream possible. 20...30...40 ounces and hour and still (really!?), still she's 'so so thirsty'! Why is she waking up to tell us she wants MORE to drink? Is this some kind of new toddler game we haven't heard about? Does she have a bladder infection? Do we tell her no? What are we going to do about these sheets??
A lot of our pictures look like this (sippies as far as the eye can see!):
Still, we enjoyed our vacation and made the flight home safely none the wiser. Three days later, upon some advice from a friend to just 'get her checked out', and even more thirst complaints (even at 3am) I decided I'd better do just that. I had some idea of the fact it could be diabetes, a dread, I suppose, going in to that appointment - but it seemed so... far-fetched. Dream like. She couldn't have diabetes! No one in either of our families has had it, that just wouldn't make sense.
The doctor knew, the nurse knew, and 20 minutes later so did I.
We spent 3 nights in PICU, where we ranged from emotions of disbelief, rage, angst, pity, sorrow and worry. Once we jumped through those emotional hoops, we began to get educated. She began to feel better thanks to hydration and insulin, and we began our 'new normal'. This blog is to document bits and pieces of our lives surrounding things as little as day to day, and as big as the future.
Thankfully there are a lot of good sources out there, and thank God for the internet - sincerely. The support out there and the 'family' of people just like us is an amazing comfort and a huge pit of knowledge for us to pull from.
Flash forward to today: we're still young into our diagnosis, but we have a routine and some knowledge that is coupled with anywhere from 5-10 'pokes' (finger stick blood sugar checks) and 4+ shots of insulin a day, and Sierra has her moments but she is full of energy, love and the wackiness I always expect will be there. We count carbs, we watch snacks, we keep our chins up at potlucks and birthday parties and we learn as we go.
I look forward to letting it out here. This was just the introduction :) I'm Melissa, mother to Sierra (our little diabetic - she'll be 4 in May), Max - nearly 2 and boy wonder of the house, and wife to Frank - who is forever graciously listening to my 'reading-way-too-much-online and word-vomiting it back at him the second he gets home' moments. We are a family, and we're going to take this thing by the horns as best we can. Here's to the highs and lows of diabetes (that's a lame diabetes pun, get it?), and this blog.
Welcome to our new normal.
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